How To Stop Tripping Over Your Inner Clutter
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Hello Reader, Disappointment... Hurt feelings... Betrayal... Unworthiness... Metaphorically speaking, experiences like these can feel like you've tripped over some unseen object and been knocked painfully to the ground. You may feel like you've had the wind knocked out of you... Feel bruised... Or, maybe even have broken a metaphorical bone or two. And it can be very easy to assume that the source of the stumble was whoever's on the other side of those feelings. After all, they sure looked like they're the culprit. The words came out of their mouths or the actions were done by them. So, of course, the resulting pain must be because of them. This is why it may surprise you to hear that the secret to avoiding these painful tumbles is not what you'd expect. Because what you might have been told is that you need good... or better... boundaries. Rules about your behavior that are designed to protect you... Made by you in response to past painful experiences. By nature, boundaries need to be rigid, apply to many situations, and give you a sense of certainty. And, they'll be based on a collection of evidence, combined with what you believe you 'should' do. Well, the truth is... Boundaries do more to restrict than to protect you... Because they simply can't shield you from the true source of your vulnerability. Know Who You AreNow, this isn't to say that others can't do or say hurtful things... They absolutely can, and sadly, sometimes do. It isn't to say that your hurt, disappointment, betrayal, or unworthiness aren't real feelings... Because they are. What I'm saying is similar to the insight that Morpheus offered to Neo in the movie, The Matrix. What are you trying to tell me... that I can dodge bullets? No Neo, I'm trying to tell you that when you're ready... you won't have to. — The Matrix In the film, Neo doesn't understand who he is. It's this lack of clarity that makes him susceptible to being injured. But once he knows the truth of his identity... He effortlessly responds to whatever assaults come his way. The same is true for you. When you know who you are and understand the true source of your vulnerability... Your tumbles and stumbles simply won't have the power to throw you down to the ground. In Human Design, this source of vulnerability is called Openness. Although, it's more accurate to think of it as receptivity. I also like the word, permeability. It's where you're designed to soak up the energies of Life... And where you're here to become wise. Picture ThisImagine that everyone is born with the same size house... And, each person has the same number of rooms, doors, and hallways. Some of those rooms have furniture already built in. And some of those rooms are empty. Now, everyone you’ve ever met has offered to give you furniture to fill your empty rooms. On top of that, they're all certain they know which furniture is best for you. And so they donate pieces to you whether you want them or not. Unfortunately, these pieces of furniture are often ugly. They nearly always have sharp edges and pointy corners. They're bulky and ill-fitting. Placed in inconvenient spots... They may block a particular view... Or even the door, making it unpleasant to get into or out of that room. They are your Inner Clutter. In Human Design, all that Inner Clutter is called Not Self Conditioning. And despite how it feels, it’s neither good nor bad. And you're neither good nor bad for having been vulnerable to it. So, depending on how much Openness you have in your design... It’s completely normal to have accepted the furniture that others were so insistent on giving you. Everyone has Inner Clutter. And everyone trips over it. That's because you were never given the light of consciousness... Which means you'll walk around these rooms in the dark. So, you frequently bump into the furniture, stubbing toes and bruising shins.. In the worst cases, you could be seriously injured, like a broken ankle, wrist, or limb... And potentially even a serious blow to the head. Now, because you can't see the furniture in the darkness... You'll be confused about why it hurts to go in there. So, you might try to avoid them as much as possible. But, these rooms are part of you and one way or another, you'll find yourself in them. And it doesn't help to learn how to do a better job of walking in the dark. What you most need to learn... Is how to turn on the lights. Fortunately, you can illuminate your way by learning about your Openness. Suddenly, you'll see the furniture with all its sharp, pointy ugliness. It will explain why it had hurt so much to be in those rooms within yourself. And in doing so, you come heart-to-heart with yourself for having accepted the donations that weren't helpful or healthy for you. You become free of judging, blaming, or shaming yourself for not being better at preventing that furniture from taking up space inside of you. You can even become free of judging, blaming, or shaming others for insisting that you accept the furniture. Eventually, you'll understand that they themselves had been pressured to accept that furniture from others.. And because they had no way of knowing it wasn’t correct for them, they had no way of knowing that it wasn’t correct for you. You Have ArrivedYou arrive at a space within yourself where you simply get to decide whether you want to...
Whatever you choose, you get to redesign that room so that when you do spend time there, you get to enjoy it to the fullest. And finally... Stop tripping over your inner clutter.
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