Your Dutiful Self vs Your True Self
|
Hello Reader, "Do not seek water, seek thirst," wrote the Sufi poet Rumi. With the beginning of the new year, it's common to consider what to do differently in the coming months. We usually go straight for the "water"—the resolutions and the checklists. But what if the secret to a transformative year isn't in the seeking of results, but in the cultivation of a deeper internal thirst? The common perception is that if you start with what you're doing, you can change who you are. When in fact, the exact opposite is true. What you do and how you do it emerges from who you are being. And so, if you want to experience different results, begin with your "thirst," and that lies at the core of who you are. Starting at your core means coming heart to heart with who you are. And, for this, you need to ask the question... Are you living as your True Self, or are you making choices from what Angeles Arrien calls your 'dutiful self?' And, how can you even tell the difference? Your 'dutiful self' is the expression of your True Self that wants to behave in ways that make others happy or avoid uncomfortable confrontations. It's the expression of yourself that uses adrenaline, force, existential fear, or will to push you to behave in ways that make you acceptable and valuable to others. It's the part of you that compromises your truth, sacrifices your health, or gives up your autonomy to meet others' expectations. And, even when you think the expectations are your own, you need to look deeply into your programmed perceptions with clear-eyed awareness that you've absorbed those 'dutiful self' ideas, and now mistakenly believe they're your own. So, how can you know what conditioned thoughts and beliefs are truly yours? Seek Your TruthIf you've spent time seeking your Truth, you'll have found many systems and frameworks offering to guide you. All are pointing toward the same point on the horizon. Some are more general. Others are more specific. Some are maps of you. Others are mirrors of awareness. Human Design illustrates a highly detailed, unique, and specific map of the attributes you chose for this current incarnation. It's akin to an owner's manual. It's a guide that tells you what all the features can do and not do. For example, a Smart car isn't going to be your best choice if you want to win the Indy 500. Likewise, your IndyCar won't be great for driving around town. So, if you try to force either one to perform in ways contrary to its design, you're not going to enjoy the ride. Are you a Smart car trying to race in the Indy 500? Likewise, are you an IndyCar trying to fit in slower lanes and tighter spaces? Your Human Design chart can tell you which attributes are available to you all the time and which may come and go. You'll learn which Smart or Indy gifts and talents you have. This knowledge supports you in living in alignment with your True Self. It also helps you to identify how you've been programmed to prioritize your 'dutiful self' so you can begin to shed limiting beliefs and behaviors. Take ActionYou can download your free Human Design Chart and Custom Report today. Inside, you'll find an illustration of your bodygraph and descriptions of your Type, Profile, Strategy, Authority, Centers, Channels, and Gates. When you get your report, soften your inner gaze and hold what you see lightly. It's easy to be overwhelmed by the amount and density of the information. Like that car manual, you can't take it all in and also understand how to apply it at first glance. Notice what lights up for you, what calls your attention to it? Be present to that and listen for quiet hints encoded within it. One of the most effective ways to receive and integrate this knowledge is to journal about what you notice for each feature of your design. Do you notice resistance or fear? Is there a glimmer of recognition and welcoming energy? Whatever you sense, write it down without judgment, blame, or shame. Allow yourself to wander and wonder a bit. At its best, Human Design isn't a rulebook. It's a multi-dimensional look into your inner world. What you find there is yours to decide how to apply in your daily life. Send your questions and reach out anytime. Zette |